Did they sin?

Rahab did not even stammer, she was trembling from her head to her toes. She could feel the heat rising. She knew what the soldiers of Jericho were going to ask…she could hear the two spies’ last shuffles as they discreetly hid themselves from view. Opening her door, she came face to face with not only the Kings’ soldiers, but also a moral dilemma. Would she tell the truth…or lie?

            “We come in the name of the King, bring forth the men that have come to you, to this house, for they are spies!”

Did she hesitate? From the passage it is doubtful since they believed her…her answer was simple and part truth: “They had come, but are gone now, but if you run fast you will catch them!” The first part is truth, they had come.

She chose to lie, but two lives were saved…does the ends justify the means? After all she was never rebuked by God.

(For the whole account/further study see Joshua 2)

David’s heart was beating something fierce. The fear within him rose until it was choking him, the pressure in his throat made it hard to swallow, and the heat of the moment was upon him. As he stood before King Achish, a fear swept over him. But he like Rahab not only faced danger but also a choice…would he lie or be truthful?

In a moment of time a choice was to be made, and as he stood trembling before this king, with the fear of death stinging him, he feigned a mental disorder.

Of course we know that David was in his right mind…so he therefore lied…but his life was saved, and God again never said anything against him for this…so do the ends justify the means?

Just because God does not say something specific, does it means that it is okay? What do we do with “Thou shalt not lie”??? Should that alone be enough evidence to show the sin of David and Rahab? The Bible is clear isn’t it??

“For the word of God is living, and active, and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing even to the dividing of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and quick to discern the thoughts and intents of the heart.” Hebrews 4:12

( For the whole account/further study see 1 Samuel 21)

Abraham and Sarah were taking the long trek to Egypt. Watching Sarah’s beautiful features, Abraham’s love for her swelled within him, he could not imagine having her taken from him. And so he purposed in his mind to tell Pharaoh that she was his sister. “Then they won’t take her.” He thought he had it all figured out…leaning on your own understanding always seems to give that side affect (Prov. 3:5-6) but God has a way of brining us quickly down from that cloud and showing us just who is boss, Who is to be obeyed at ALL costs at ALL times! Turns out that Sarah was taken anyway, but God in His sovereignty protected her. Abraham lied…but Sarah was still protected so does the ends justify the means?? Did God let that lie just slip??

And there was I, arriving at work one day. I clocked in, nothing new and turned to head to my room, when my boss called me into the office. Walking in I figured that perhaps she wanted me to go on bus run…or perhaps if I am really lucky she has reassigned me to another room and I won’t have to spend my day with the 14 terrible twos! But neither of those had she in mind.

My co-worker and I had built a good relationship, she is a Christian and a very hard worker, and she always tries her best. But my boss had something against her, not sure why. She always seemed to be looking for the worst in my co-worker, even if it was a small things she would hone in on it and make a mountain out of a mole hill.

Looking at me, she simply asked “Has ____ ever done anything that she should not.”

Now in a daycare those are some words that you never want to hear, especially in todays day and age where false accusations are made by parents all the time. Without real thought, (I don’t always think well” on the spot” I often need to step back and think things through.)

I said “No”, but then an incident from about a year previous randomly popped into my head…and I had a moment just like David and Rahab…would I tell the truth or lie?

This time I told the truth, I shared the account which was nothing too serious and assured my boss, that I was sure that ___ had learned from it and would never do it again. She thanked me and promised me that she would never let ___ know that it was me that told.

So I proceeded to my room and began changing the endless diapers. Watching the clock I counted down the time till ___ would arrive. Before long she came through the door, and I could tell by her body language that something was amiss. She immediately started asking my other two co-workers if they had told our boss a story about her. They of course said “no.” Then came the moment in time when I again faced a moment to speak truth and trust God, or to take things into my own hands and sin.

I could feel the heat come to my cheeks, she turned and looked me square in the eye, she looked almost doubtful that I would do it but asked anyway “Bethany…did you tell our boss that I did this?” In that instant I chose to take things into my own hands….leaning on my own understanding of the situation (Prov. 3:5-6). “No.”

At one point she left the room, I turned to my other co-workers…”I just lied to her…I can’t believe I just did that…I should tell her the truth.” They both said “No, just leave it.” And so I did.

And the rest of the day went well as far as our relating to one another, but inside my stomach was turning and my heart was amuck.

That night the stories of David and Rahab came to my mind ( not a coincidence). And I knew that they both like me had faced the fear of man, and chose to fear man more than God and chose to take things into their own hands instead of trusting their Almighty Maker who is able to answer beyond anything we can ever ask or imagine.

Now I understand the debate on these passages…that God never rebuked them.

You know our God truly is amazing! He will always get the glory and His purposes will always be accomplished! Even when we sin, He is glorified! He has that wonderful way about Him to take sin…ugly and black as it is and use it for His glory…I mean think of Samson…of Paul before he got saved and all the persecutors of the Christians, the Bible says that they grew stronger under persecution…think about it they grew stronger in their faith because of someone else’s sin!

Think of JUDAS for goodness sake!
So whether you are a Paul, totally sold out for Christ, totally engaged in the battle for worship and service, or whether you are Judas who has started playing for the opposing team, or whether you are a Pharisee who is worshipping the true God but with the wrong motives, take NOTE you will still be used of God! He has a wonderful power to take and turn things inside out and use them for His glory!

So as I contemplated a lot of these things that night, I knew what had to be done!
I called my mom and she too told me the same thing. So the next day, with my good relationship and testimony to lose (but really it had already been lost because I had already sinned against God and her.) I told the truth. You should have seen the faces of my other two co-workers who had told me to just leave it…they were shocked. And to see the look of shock and anger on her face, to feel the weight of her anger the rest of that day, even the two year olds could feel it and knew something was wrong.

I love what my dad said, “you know Bethy, things will be different from here on out. Things will never be the same,  because you sinned. And just because you made it right does not mean that everything goes back to normal, there are always consequences to sin whether you see them right away or not.”

And how right was he! Things were different and still are. Oh yes she is no longer mad at me, but she def. does not treat me the same, there is still that density between us. But I am thankful that things have healed for the most part and I am thankful for the mercy and grace of my wonderful Father in heaven!

So I believe that what David and Rahab and Abe (and myself as well) was all wrong. I believe that God’s Word always stands true (“thou shalt not lie.”) and that there are never “loop holes” to the written and clear Word of God. Sure there are gray areas (music…playing cards going to the theater..) and the Spirit works in those areas.  But when it comes to the black and white it is THUS SAITH THE LORD and there is no way around that!
However I gladly welcome discussion, and would love to hear from you what your thoughts are! Thanks for reading, and may God shed the light of His countenance on this subject (or just help us to see the light that has been shining there all along??)

The Perfect mother??

No mother is perfect, no mother does everything right, this is due to the fall of man, due to our sin nature! So obviously I am not going to say that "my mom is perfect," or even that she "comes as close to perfect as this side of heaven you can be." But I will say that she is perfect for me!!

God is so amazing in that He always knows what is the very best for us, even down to the minor details such as who should be our parents, and because Sherrill and Jeff Duffy are my parents they are therefore the BEST parents for me! None other would do, because those two very special people were the very people God picked to be my parents!

Therefore I can wish for none other!! So I wanted to begin this note by stating that my mother is not perfect, but that she is perfect for me!! And I praise God that He chose her for me and me for her!!

You see God had it all planned out before I was born! He knew EXACTLY what it would take to bring me to Himself! He knew that it would take me being raised by a certain Jeff and Sherrill, none other would do! It is so amazing for me to stand back and reflect on all the little details of my life and see the sovereignty of God! He is so amazing, so far above me! I am so insignificant... nothing to note... nothing for the very God of Heaven the very creator to even look on let alone smile on! And yet He stoops down and notices little and awfully sinful me! And He not only notices me but knows me better than I know myself!! I like David am compelled to say

"When I consider your heavens,
       the work of your fingers,
       the moon and the stars,
       which you have set in place,

  what is man that you are mindful of him,
       the son of man that you care for him?" Psalm 8:3-4



Krista was my parents first child, and she was a perfect fit for them ( again God's sovereignty must be noted here:). She was so good, all they had to do when her sinful nature reared its ugly head was to give a stern look (just one) and she would start crying and stop whatever sinful action she was taking.
MY parents were just young pups then (in fact my dad was my age exactly!!! Hard to believe it!).

Anyway they were really young and my dad was still in college when Krista was born. So when I was born I can almost bet that they were expecting me to be just the same way as Krista! But boy were they wrong!! God must have a sense of humor, for He really through them a curve ball in giving them me!

Krista and I are as different as night and day! Where she was good and sweet, I was mischievous and a tyrant! It took a lot of force to get me to do what they easliy got Krista to do! So I can only imagine how hard it must have been for my mother! And yet I always remember having great patience with me! Oh yes I tested her waters, but somehow she always managed to keep those waters calm and peaceful!
Then Joe came, her first and precious son. What patience had she with his countless window breakings, and boyish antics of catching frogs and bugs and the like, and all the trouble we got into together.

And she thought she was to be only a mother of three. But as Joseph left toddler age and went into a young child she yearned for yet another. I remember when she told us she was pregnant, we were elated! For by this time we were old enough to understand (I was only three when Joe was born, so I really did not remember it).

Her and dad called us into his office at Fellowship Baptist in Des, Moines where he was the associate pastor at the time. And she showed us the test, Krista always having been interested in babies knew exactly what those lines meant, I was confused as was Joe, but after some explanation the room filled with our screams of joy as we jumped up and down. Dad of course in his usual manner looked on with joy as did mom.

But that happiness was cut short, as we lost that precious babe. Long about December we had a visit to the doctor and no heart beat could be heard. Little Joshy had gotten the cord wrapped around his kneck and he passed away before we could see his beautiful face. But one thing we know he will never stray from his Lord for he is always at his side in heaven!

For awhile we took time to heal from that. We were all so excited and then had our hopes cut short. But God knew exactly what He was doing and He had perfect reasons as to calling Joshua home, and I would not have it any other way.

Mom got pregnant once again, this time we were excited yes, but there was that unsaid apprehension of if we would lose this one two. But God in His matchless grace granted to us Andrew. The precious miracle boy was a wonderful delight to us all, but especially Joe, for now he had a playmate…well sort of.

The next two years were honestly some of the craziest years of our lives! Little did we know that when mom and dad said “four no more” that God would throw us a couple curve balls! Funny how we think we have things figured out then God says “Nuh-uh!”
Just fourteen months after little Drew was born, Caleb came into the world! And he was a mama’s boy from the start. Dad held him first and he cried and cried until he was in mama’s arms then all crying ceased, and to this day he is not ashamed to admit that mama still is really the only one who can calm him!

Then shortly after Caleb God surprised us again with the blessing of another little girl! Our precious Breanna was born! She has been full of life right from the start!
Boy were those some crazy years weren’t they mama? Three small children…the countless diapers…bottles…tussles…sleepless nights! It truly was crazy! But somehow you corralled all us kids! Homeschooling us, cooking for us, being a wonderful wife (Pastor’s wife at that!). It is hard to believe all the things you did and still do! Thankyou!

She has always been resourceful, and well organized. I took it for granted her choice and dedication to homeschool all six of us kids! She has always been loving, the one who I can go to with a problem and who always was ready to dry that tear, to guide and direct in loving ways! She has always been that good listening ear, to this day I still call her at least once a day to check in and tell her of what is going on!

So here’s to you mom! Thankyou for reflecting Jesus Christ! Thankyou for faithfully rearing my heart towards Him! Thankyou for being the one who lead me to Him that February eve when I was but four!

Thankyou for being the precious mother of:

Krista Michelle (Tee)
Bethany Renae (Boobopper)
Joseph Aaron   (Pud)
Joshua              (Heavenly child)
Andrew Levi ( Rubber Duck)
Caleb Scott      (Drool Bucket/mama’s boy)
Breanna Kae    (Pooka Butt/ nana)

WE ALL LOVE YOU MOM! HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!

Becoming like your god..

PSALM 115:4-8
“Their idols are silver and gold, The work of men's hands. They have mouths, but they speak not; Eyes have they, but they see not; They have ears, but they hear not; Noses have they, but they smell not; They have hands, but they handle not; Feet have they, but they walk not; Neither speak they through their throat. They that make them shall be like unto them; Yea, every one that trusteth in them.”

Now if you are anything like me, your first thought after reading this might be:

 “Yeah well this does not apply to me, because I trust in the TRUE and LIVING God JEHOVAH, YAHWEH, ELOHIM! So these verses have nothing to do with me!

I mean after all you will never see me bow before a golden image, or even a rock, or tree. You won’t ever see me rub Buddha’s belly. No I do not worship idols! This does not apply!”

But perhaps with further meditation, and deeper searching of your heart God will reveal to you what He has to me.

No I don’t physically bow to any type of image, and I don’t physically rub Buddha’s belly, but in a metaphorical sense I do these things! No my idol worship is a lot more subtle, more hidden, and almost unrecognizable (were it not for the Holy Spirit!)

We as Americans don’t physically bow or rub belly’s, but we do worship at the feet of other gods, rather than the true and living God!

My idols are my own self. You only worship what you trust and love, and you only trust and love in something because you have a desire and you think that desire will be fulfilled in what you are trusting.

So for me it looks like this: I trust and love myself, and I do this because I have the desire for the praise of men (I want to be worshipped), and how I get that (or hope to get that) is to stay skinny (eating disorder/really it is just simply sin, but for the sake of clarification…eating disorder).

Wow! It actually hurt to write this out! To realize before my very eyes the sad state and endless cycle of uselessness!

 I believe that all false worship can boil down to quite literally a worship of self. Because whether you are an American worshiping yourself, or money, or a car, or a sport, or your job, or another person, or whether you are less sophisticated and you are an Israelite bowing to the calf while Mo is up on Mt. Sinai receiving the commandments, or you are a Buddha Belly rubber, all of us want the same things: to feel good, and to have our desires fulfilled! We worship the “thing” so to get what we want.

But the whole thing is backwards and wrong! Because first off we are worshipping the wrong thing, and secondly we are worshipping for the wrong reasons!

And when we do that, the verses I shared at the beginning tell us exactly what we will become, we will become like our idol, USELESS and hopeless!

Think about it! As a Christian this would mean that you would be rendered useless! How? You might ask. I mean after all, our hearts are always wandering. For we are always either, worshipping the wrong thing, for the wrong reasons, or the Right Person with the wrong reasons.

You see there are two battle fields that we will always fight on. Either we will be tempted to worship the wrong thing with the wrong reasons or the right Person with the wrong reasons and when we do this, every part of our life is affected by this!

How? You might ask. We worship every moment of everyday! So that means two things: First you will always be in battle! No wonder God exhorted us to put on His armor!

Every moment of everyday battle lines are being drawn, and many of them very subtly! Think about it, this very moment you are worshipping something…what is that something? Are you alert to this? Are you engaged? Or are you just “passively” worshipping (no worship is passive, though sometimes it may have the appearance.)

Secondly the fact that we worship everyday means that we are always serving that which we worship! So if we are worshipping the wrong thing with the wrong reasons, we are useless because everything we do is done for the wrong thing and with the wrong reason.

It is like as if we are playing soccer and we are the blue team going against the red. And we begin to hate the very team we are on (God) and we purposefully score a point for the red team (false god). We served the wrong team and it was no accident we did it for the wrong reasons, for the praise of the other team!

But you might say, well what about those who worship the true God, but for the wrong reasons. Meaning that they make Elohim to be but a mere genie in a lamp, pulling Him out only as trouble comes or as they need something. In other words He is just someone to fulfill our needs.

We are still rendered useless as servant’s to Him because everything we do will be for our own praise, and Jesus told the Pharisees’ that those who worship God for the wrong reasons will get one prize and one alone: the praise of men! Earthly praise. But as Christians that is never our aim! Our aim is to lay up treasures in heaven!

So you see that way, you are always in a battle for your heart, you are always worshipping, and you are always serving. We don’t have to be told to worship or serve, we always will, but we do need to be told Who and why to worship! It is always then not only just about Who we worship and serve, but WHY we worship and serve!

So have you been rendered useless? Have you become like your god?? Unable to do anything :

PS. 115:4-8 “They have mouths, but they speak not; Eyes have they, but they see not; They have ears, but they hear not; Noses have they, but they smell not; They have hands, but they handle not; Feet have they, but they walk not; Neither speak they through their throat. They that make them shall be like unto them; Yea, every one that trusteth in them.”

But know this, no matter what God will always get the glory and His purposes will always be accomplished! Even if you are scoring points for the other team (by worshipping the wrong thing, for the wrong reasons) or if you are worshipping Him with the right reasons, He still will WIN!

So whether you are a Paul, totally sold out for Christ, totally engaged in the battle for worship and service, or whether you are Judas who has started playing for the opposing team, or whether you are a Pharisee who is worshipping the true God but with the wrong motives, take NOTE you will still be used of God! He has a wonderful power to take and turn things inside out and use them for His glory!
So no matter what He always wins! Are you on His side? It is a daily battle for your heart, are you engaged? Are you aware?? Or are you just passive, not taking note??

Psalm 116:17a "I will offer to You the sacrifice of thanksgiving."  And vs. 16 talks about our being set free from the chains of sin. Application of all this is we need to give God thanks for the sacrifice of His Son, for being our creator, because He is above us all (right reason for worship).
To give thanks for a sacrifice requires a sacrifce:
Romans 12:1-2 "I appeal to you brothers, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God, which is your REASONABLE act of Worship!"

A stone's throw from the Israelites of Moses' day???

The Israelites had been freed from Egyptian slavery and were wandering in the wilderness. While there God provided them with guidance ( a cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night) , yet they complained about wandering, and that things had been better in Egypt.
God also provided them with food and not just any food, this was food that rained down from heaven, and was enough for each individual person, they we not starving. This food they called Manna: a bread like substance. But then we see that they also complained about this food as well, they claimed that they wanted something better, they wanted meat!!

So God gave them meat... and lots of it!!! He gave them live quail, in fact so much that it was 3 ft. deep!!! Now if that is not alot of meat.. I don't know what is!! This would be heaven for me just hand me a BB gun and I would go to town with killing them!!! That would be the perfect hunting day!!

Anyways where was I??? OH yes the quail!! So they complained about that later on! God also provided them with water when they needed it and also guidance through Moses, through His commands and also pillar of cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night!

Also let's not forget the very fact that He gave them freedom from Egypt, got them across the red sea and cured them from a terrible sickness that came from snakes ( lifting up the snake in the wilderness).
And He also restrained from punishing them time and again and they were in fact on their way to the promised land. They were SO SO blessed in many ways, and yet we find them in the book of Exodus complaining time and again.

And I as an American in the 21st century look at that and click my tongue as if to say "Shame, shame you Israelites!! Can't you see what God has and is doing for you?? Why are you complaining??" And in fact I am tempted to think that I am better then them, when in fact I am way worse then them!

For I have it far greater than they. After all I live in a nice dorm ( when at school) and a nice House ( when I am home) versus a tent. I really don't have to travel everyday like they did and when I do it most often is not on foot ( minus my walk to work which is prolly not even half a mile I am pretty certain that they walked MILES) I can just hop into a car and get where I am going.
I have plenty of food whenever I need it, and it is never just bread or quail I have way more variety than that. And though I have not been freed from egyptian slavery I have been freed in an even greater sense from the slavery of my sin!!!! Because of Christ the son of God's death on the cross I have been freed from the guilt and shame and punishment of my sin and am now a child of God's!!

And I too am headed to a promised land just as they were but my promised land is way better as well! For heaven you see is even greater than their promised land for this promised land is free of sin and it is the most perfect place.

So as you can see I have it even better than they did, and yet I complain just as much as they did if not more than they did! And when I really began to think about this I thought to myself "How could this be? How could I look down on the Israelites for complaining when I myself have it better off then they did and complain even more than they did!"

All this was brought to mind in my quiet time with God the past few days. My Bible reading has been in Psalm 78 and in versus 18- 21 it talks about the Israelites and how they complained against God. First it states what God had given them and then it states that they complained. And it just got me to thinking about the seriousness of complaining.

Psalm 78:18-21

18 They willfully put God to the test
by demanding the food they craved.

This verse shows me what complaining it. It states
that complaining is willfull in that they willfully complained. It is never mindless like sometimes I like to think it is.
I would sometimes like to dismiss my complaining as "out of my control" in that I say that "well If things were not this way, or if I only had this_____, then I would not complain" But that is never true for I would find something to complain about even if I had all the riches in the world!! But what is complaining?
Complaining is speaking against God when you think about it honestly!! WE would like to think that we complain because of our circumstances, because of not having what we think we need. Or complaing about the fact that there are things we want but do not have. Take the Israelites for instance, in this verse at the end it says that they were demanding that God give them the food they craved. Notice how it does not say by demanding for the food they needed, no it does not say that because they already had food, the problem was they did not have the food they really wanted.

Complaining is speaking against God because what I am saying to God when I complain is that "I deserve better than what He has provided" When in reality I DO NOT deserve even what He has given me!! You see complaing when taken honestly is a serious sin! It is speaking against God! This means that anytime I complain no matter what I am complaining about I am telling God that I deserve better, I am telling Him that who HE is and what He has done matters nothing to me and is not sufficent.
It is as if I am looking at Jesus on the cross suffering and dying for my sin and all I have to say is "I want more... give me more!"

I am but a stones throw from Israel... in fact I am worse because I have it better than they!

19 They spoke against God, saying,
"Can God spread a table in the desert?

We see here that complainig is as I stated before speaking against God, the creator of the universe and me and the savior of the world! It also shows that He is fully capable of providing for my needs ( food in particular) and it matters not where I am for He can and will provide for me no matter where I am!

20 When he struck the rock, water gushed out,
and streams flowed abundantly.
But can he also give us food?
Can he supply meat for his people?"

As stated earlier and as seen in this verse God provided them with water ( He does this for me as well for there is an endless supply of it with just a turn of a knob and any faucet nearest me, and I am never far from one. And to think I do not even have to strike a rock!!)
He aslo provided them with meat because they were tireing of the manna, and to think that I have more variety than that and yet I too still complain!! Just a stones throw folks... just a stones throw!!!

21 When the LORD heard them, he was very angry;
his fire broke out against Jacob,
and his wrath rose against Israel

And finally were learn here that complaining angers God, and RIGHTLY SO!!!
Imagine, you make a good dinner for someone. Then after the dinner all that person did was to tell you how bad it tasted and what all you did wrong and then they proceeded to say what would have been better. And how angry you would be?? And don't say that you would not be because you would, we all hate it when we go to great lengths to do something nice for someone and all that person has to say is complaints about the thing we did.

Or imagine that you are in the hot desert, with a friend. And the friend gets thirsty and you are the only one with water left, so you let your friend have the rest, choosing to go thirsty just so your friend will have some water. And then after drinking it alll your friend has to say is to complain about the water and how much better the water at home was, the friend does not even thank you in fact he just keeps on complaing. All that sacrifice for him and all he has to say is complaints!!!

And yet we do the very same thing to God!! He provides me with far greater than what the Israelits had and yet I complain just as much if not more than they!
I am no better, in fact I am worse!!

And not only that but God has sent His son to die for me, I am permanately free from sin and will one day be with my Father in heaven FOREVER! What could be greater than that?? Even if I had nothing left but salvation at least I would have salvation!!!

You see the bottom line here is I must never think that I deserve better for I do not even deserve what I do have!! I have been redeemed, that is the greatest thing, the sin of complaining is serious and deadly and contagious ( it affected the entire tribe of Israel, and we see it happen everyday. A family is all fine and good until someone starts complaining and then it is like a stone has been thrown into a pond, the ripples go everywhere stirring up the once calm water.)

May I remember the seriousness of my complaining and never make excuses for it never let it consume mny thoughts and words. May I rememeber that I do not even deserve what I do have. May I be content with what I have, and may I live a life of thankfulness and gratitude toward the GREAT GOD,the sustainer, the provider of ALL needs, the lover and redeemer of this wretched prodigal (me).
May I repent of the sin of complaining and rely on God to rid me of that and to become a more true and thankful follower of Him!

Have we become sophisticated in our blameshifting?

It is true, we have been blame shifting ever since sin first entered the world. As we know Adam shifted the blame of his sin on Eve when God confronted him on eating of the forbidden fruit. Adam said that "the woman that you gave to me, she gave me the forbidden fruit."

So we see that men blameshift. Then we also see that women blameshift as well for Eve when God turned His attention to her blamed it on Satan. And Satan was never given the chance to shift any blame but one has to wonder if he would have tried.
( The account of the fall is found in Genesis 3).
So we can see from the history of man and sin that blameshifting has been around for since the beginning of sin.

So you are all probably wondering how we have gotten "sophisticated" in our blameshifting?
Well we learn from the account of the Fall that Adam and Eve shifted their blame on other people ( or in Eve's case on a fallen angel...Satan.)
And it is true we still do that today, we often say after we have sinned "Well if you had not done___" or "Well you did____ and that is why I ___" and you fill in the blank. This form of blameshifiting is all too common place. In fact believe it or not but I have actually caught myself not only giving this excuse to people but I have caught myself telling God this as well. After I have sinned it has been my practice to pray and confess it to God and ask His forgiveness ( either after or before confessing and asking forgiveness from the humans I have wronged).

And I must be totally honest because there have been times where I have actually begun to say to God "Forgive me Father for doing such and such, or for saying such and such, but if they had not done such and such..." and that is when the Holy spirit works in me and tugs at my heart letting me know that blameshifiting is a sin, and then I have to not only confess the first sin I commited but also the second sin of blameshifting. I am no better than Adam and Eve, for this is exactly what they did, they blameshifted right in front of the face of God. No we can't talk to God face to face as Adam and Eve did, but we do pray and sometimes in my praying I find myself shifting the blame of my sin on other people.
I have forgotten

 

 Ecclesiasties 5:2
" Do not be quick with your mouth,
do not be hasty in your heart
to utter anything before God.
God is in heaven
and you are on earth,
so let your words be few." I have too easily forgotten to whom I am speaking with!!


So you are probably thinking by now "okay Bethany so you so far have showed us nothing more sophisticated in the area of blameshifting" but may I say "just hold your horses I am getting there."

So we know that blameshifting has been here since the fall and that we have even been using blameshifting with God.
But the way we have become more sophisticated in our blameshifting is in the fact that we not only shift the blame of our sin on other people around us but now we also shift the blame of our sin onto our circumstances!

We do not see Adam nor Eve blaming their sin on circumstances, but only on other people.
But shifting the blame on circumstances is all too common place today! It is seen in times when we get angry. Take me for instance, when I get angry and fly off the handle I say "Well I am just stressed." And what is stress?? It is caused by circumstances. Or better yet I say "I got angry because I had a bad day at work... or I am working on very little sleep right now."
And again sometimes I even try to use these when I confess my sin to God.

You see as time has gone on the curse and really sin has only gotten worse and worse. As time has gone on we have become more sophisticated and more deeply entrenched in sin, to where often times we have become numb to it. This is why praying for a heart like David, who in the Psalms when speaking of his sin said that the thoughts of it made his bones dry up. We must pray for a sensitivity to sin, to see it, and to have the courage to not blameshift but to rather call and see sin as what God calls and sees it as.

Blameshifting is the attempt to either convice yourself or others or even God ( or all three in many cases) that the sin that you commited was somehow out of your control. In other words you are trying to get others to think and see that the sin that you commited was totally out of your power to stop.
When we shift the blame to people we want others to think that it was someone elses fault, when we shift the blame to circumstances we want people to think that it was because we did not get enough sleep, or that it was inbred into our genes or because of our culture that we are living in.

Another way that we have become sophisticated in the area of blameshifting is in the area of emotions or feelings. We often hear speakers say that love is a choice and rightly so because love truly is a choice. But have you ever thought of why we as humans would ever want to think that love is a feeling?? Because it makes things easier for us ( as all blameshifting does). When love is dismissed as a feeling suddenly the blame for not loving someone is no longer in existance because most people see emotions and feelings as out of our control.

Whenever someone says that they "don't feel like loving someone" then suddenly they are not blamed for wrong actions toward that "someone" because we have all believed the lie that emotions and feelings are out of our control. You see blameshifting is a great thing to us fallen humans because it makes things seem like they are out of our control, which seems like a good thing.

 

 But as with every good thing Satan always has a counterfeit, and the counterfeit does exactly what a counterfeit should do. It acts and looks like the same as the "real deal" but then when you go and try to use it, suddenly it does not work and does not give the same results as the "real deal" does. For every good from God
(good virtues, commands that He gives) there is a counterfeit ( sin) that Satan will try to luer us with much the same way as a fishermen leurs a fish with a fake leur.

When we dismiss love as the counterfeit, just a feeling, then it never works as love should work.
Love in the real sense of the word is a choice, and when we admit that it is a choice suddenly "loving others" becomes a little easier because it is no longer out of our control like the counterfeit of love as a feeling.

 

Suddenly we learn that we can choose to love someone whether they are worthy of it or not ( which really they are according to Romans 13:8 which states that we owe every person on the planet LOVE) or whether we think that they are worthy of it or not.
Yes it becomes harder when we do not love someone because then we see that it is totally our fault because we chose not to love that someone. But as with everything there is a hard and an easy side to love when seen as a choice!

Okay so we have seen that we blameshift in the area of love, but we also do it in the area of Joy or happiness. We have probably all heard speakers say that Joy, or happiness is a choice, and RIGHTLY so because that is exactly what joy and happiness is. It is choice, you can choose to be happy.

But again have we ever thought through why we as humans would want happiness to be a feeling??
And again we have the same answer because it makes things seem easier. If you say that you do not "feel happy" then suddenly we do not blame you at all because as I stated before we have come to see emotions as out of our control ( which sometimes they may just be).
So we don't blame you.

But that is only because we have accepted Satan's luer or counterfeit as it were. We have come to see happiness as an emotion and therefore out of anyone's control.
But when we ackowledge and see joy (happiness) as what it truly is, a choice suddenly things become easier and we find that we can have happiness no matter what is going on around us, and no matter what we are going through!

Suddenly things get brighter, and start to look up when we neglect Satan's counterfeit and embrace God's "real deal."
That must be why James said in James 1, that we can consider it a joy when we face trials, because James saw happiness not as a feeling, not as dependent upon how we feel or how our circumstances or people make us feel, but rather as a choice.

So here is a question, what do love and joy have in common ( other than the fact that we wrongly call them both a feeling.)?????

The answer is that they are both fruits of the spirit! And they are both to be seen in the life of the Christian because Christ said that everyone will know we are Christians by the fruits that we display. But how could we as Christians display love and joy ( fruits of the spirit) if they are out of our control to display? How could we display something that we have no control over?? You see things get harder and more complicated when we accept Satan's counterfeit. Oh sure at first they seem easier in that we don't have to take the blame for not being happy or loving, but then when you really work that out we suddenly realize that the displaying the fruit of the spirit is no longer in our control. This is why we must never dismiss Joy and Love as just mere feelings. We must call them what God calls them: a choice!

Funny how we only do this to two of the fruits of the spirit. You never hear" well I just did not feel like having paitence" or I just "did not feel like pursuing peace with that person"

Gal. 5:16-18

"So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law. "

You see we are always at war with our sinful nature. It is our sinful nature that wants to call Love and happiness a mere feeling. It is our sinful nature that wants to shift the blame of our sin onto people and to shift the blame of our choices on feelings.
But we must be led by the spirit! The sinful nature is contrary to the Spirit, as seen in the stark difference of love as a choice versus a mere feeling!

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit." Gal. 5:22-23

So we have indeed become more sophisticated in our blameshifting! But let's not continue in this! Lets call sin and emotions what God calls them ( sin= wrong and emotions=choice)
Let's put on the fruit of the spirit and choose to have paitence love happiness, kindness etc.
Let us accect God's REAL DEAL versus Satan's counterfeit!

Facebook a ministry??

Yes it is true, ALOT of time can be wasted on facebook! And because of this stereo type many have opted to stay away entirely.
But I think that both ends spending too  much time....wasted time, and also the other end not getting on at all,  both perhaps are the wrong perspective.

An older lady who I look up to  asked me "how do you not waste time?"
And I said that whenever I get on here I make it a point to "Redeem the time." I think that we often think of this in the BIG scheme of things...like we say "OVERALL I will redeem the time."

But I ask why not be specific about it? Like I will redeem the time when I get on facebook...when I am at school...when I am eating meals...when I am waiting in a line...when I am____ and you fill in the blank.
Redeeming the time literally means to "buy it back"  how we do that is making the most of the time that God gives us, to use it to bring Him glory. This takes many forms ( encouraging someone....witnessing...studying His Word in such a way that we are preparing to share it when called on....bringing joy to people through our words...gifts...smiles...good attitudes etc.)

But the odd thing is we don't know how much time we have ( this issue I addressed in my other note on here entitled "Dear Bethany I hold your life in my hands-love God" you can read that for more on the frailty/shorness of life).
Since therefore we do not know how much time we have, and since we know God calls us to live every second of it for Him, then that means even every second on facebook!

Thus I have purposed that I whenever I check facebook, I had better be making a ministry out of it.
This could mean sending someone a "hello" or word of encouragement. Statuses are then had better not be about me but rather about God. He died for me, suffered in my place the least I could do would be to LIVE for Him in each and every way possible!

And the amazing thing is, as with every ministry, it has been more a blessing for me than for the people I try to bless!

Take this recent conversation on facebook. A friend of mine on her status asked all her friends to share the hardest time that they have ever gone through and how God got them through ( without that last part it really would not be worth sharing!! Because praise is supposed to be about God not us!)

Anyways I was one of the first one to share...and at first felt that I was "stepping out on a limb" and felt that I should not for I shared a pretty private and hard struggle. And felt that maybe it was too much or that I should not have...but after reading all of the replies I was more encouraged than I have ever been. Like I said often I go into ministry thinking "I am going to get the privilidge to bless people" then often  I come out getting more blessed myself then I could have ever blessed anyone else!

So I would encourage you to make facebook another ministry! Encourage, challenge, even witness to people! Hand your account to God asking Him to use it and to give you opportunities then take them as they come!!

Use everything you say on here,  for it goes A LONG WAYS! I have had people read my notes and comment on them who are not even my "friends" on facebook! This presents itself as a blessing and a challenge, because I must order my conversations and testimony aright on here! Also I was able to see the stuff ( hard stuff) of people's lives ( as Dr. Newman would put it) that I have never even met! And was able to learn from them, and get insight for future issues that may come up, all because one godly lady chose to use Facebook as a ministry and chose to ask her friends to post their hardest "spot" in life that they had been through and how God brought them through it!

So I challenge you all to use facebook as a ministry as well! Go out on a limb, ask people the harder questions, dig into their lives! And share your life and declare God work that He has done in your life  to others!

Funny how just yesterday my devos were on declaring God's works...specifically His faithfulness and His loving kindness

"IT is good to praise the Lord, and make music to your name, OH most High, to proclaim your love in the morning and your faithfulness at night." PSalm 92:1-2

...and my application that day was to do just that.. to tell others of His faithfulness in my life and of His love toward me. Little did I know that I would have the opporunity to do that on facebook! Of ALL PLACES!!! Don't underestimate what God can use! He can and does use all things ( even sin) for His glory!! So open yourself up to be used in ALL areas! Don't think of "Redeeming the time" as a generality...be specific! FACEBOOK: It's a ministry!

So I thank Kim , for asking the deeper questions! For stepping out on a limb, and for "Redeeming the time" by asking your friends to share the harder stuff of their lives and how God worked! What a blessing! Thank you for your example may I go and do likewise!

And I thought that I would share, what I shared on Kim's (friend of my mother's) status, and also the very unexspected reply to my post! This is just an example of how blessed one can be when they step out and try to minister and just be honest and share!

Kim's status :What is the hardest thing you have ever been through (that you are comfortable sharing publicly)? How did the Lord help you through it?

My reply #1:
My freshmen year at college! not only did I deal with getting adjusted to leaving home and going to school and homework and a new job, but we had a hard time with a girl on campus, treating my sister horriblly and on top of that I had a break-up with my boyfriend that caused havoc not only in my own personal life but also the life of my family and even my church family! How God got me through all that is through His Word! I just got up day in and out and He never failed to meet with me each day, giving me the exact "food" that I needed from His Word to get me through that day. I can't tell you or describe to you how hard those days after the breakup were, nor of the great comfort that God gave to me through His Word!

I learned SO much in that time and also even during the relationship. No matter what new "news" came up about the break-up situation, God got me and my family through it and helped us to keep going! That decision to break-up was the hardest desicion I have ever had to make! But How glad I am that God got a hold of this prodigal daughter of His! And for His forgiveness, in accepting me back after my rebellion and also for His grace! And for working in and through my parents! He shone through them! The day after the break-up I woke up and felt that I had lost alot of people (though I gained my relationship with my parents) I still felt that I had lost alot, but then I was reminded of the quote "There will be days when you will have no one and nothing at all, escept God, and that is ALL you will EVER need!" How true this was, and to think that I had to be broken to come to grips with this, but how glad I am that He broke me!

Heidi ’s reply:

I went through a similar situation, Bethany, when I was 19. I was still living at home & I was engaged to a manipulative, possessive guy for several months. It was God who was able to open my eyes and I broke it off before the wedding. H...owever, my rebellion affected many others, too. I praise the Lord not only for His protection, but also that my parents prayed for me and did not give up on me. I learned to depend on Him and wait for His will and timing for His plan for me. The Lord has blessed with me with a wonderful husband, we've been married for 13 years, and He has blessed us with 4 children here on Earth. 2 more await us in Heaven.
I am most thankful for His mercy and grace and His free gift of Salvation that I have accepted. I no longer carry the weight of guilt for my past choices because He's taken them upon Himself. I praise Him for His unquestioning forgiveness and constant love for me. : )
Thanks, Kim, for encouraging us to share. : )

My reply to Heidi:

Heidi, though I have never met you, your story sounds SO much like mine it was like reading my OWN writing! The guy I had dated was also possesive and manipulative, and extremely disrespectful to my parents. He was pushing for enga...gement and marriage ( we had even talked about just eloping and running off, praise be to God that I did not!) my dad would not allow him to get engaged to me
Thank you SO much for sharing! It is such an encouragement to me to know that someone else went through almost exactly what I did, and how God got a hold of you as He did me! And that you too had parents that were faithful in praying for you ( mine were too) and also that they forgave you as mine have! It was good to hear of it from someone who has gotten farther along in life than myself! For I recently came out of that, while you have been out for a while longer.

It was good to hear about what kind of future is possible for me, despite the mistakes I have made.

" I no longer carry the weight of guilt for my past choices because He's taken them upon Himself." ( this is a quote from you)
For the last year of my life I carried the guilt around, thinking that I could never marry because of my mistakes, until here recently when I was able to talk to a godly woman I look up to ( also the women who God used to get a hold of me about breaking up with the guy I was dating). This lady helped me to be reminded about God's forgiveness, even for the awful things I did. And I finally surrendered to God that if He would have me to marry I would or if He would have me to stay single I would.

What a weight was lifted off! I was closed to marriage entirely, becaus eI thought that I had to stay single, so to hear about your story...of getting married and having children, and of learning and growing through such a hard time, it was a wonderful encouragement to me! Thank you SO much for sharing! Your story gave me more hope and encouragement! And I too Praise God for His forgiveness! I LOVE YOUR quote that I copied above! Something that I will need to constantly remind myself of...because even though I know and believe that I am forgiven, the guilt still creeps up every once in a while.

So thankyou for the reminder :)

Heidi’s reply:

Can ya'll give me any ideas-----we have a young girl in our homeschool group that is dating a very controlling guy. Her Mom is REALLY concerned. Unfortunately, I don't know her well-----just see her for a few minutes every few weeks. Are there any things I could say or mention to get her to think hard about things?

Bethany, thank you so much for sharing this. What a difficult, difficult thing. Praise the Lord for His love and forgiveness and that He was there for you during a very difficult time in your life. By the way, I appreciated the "book" :-) very much. It encouraged me to know the details of how the Lord worked in your life during a very difficult time.

My reply to Kristy:

Kristi Stapler, I would encourage you to share what the godly lady shared with me. She saids that I, though 18, still had the responsibility to obey God by obeying my parents. She reminded me that I was not married yet, thus I was still un...derneath of my parents thus eph. 6:1 was still true for me, I was to obey my parents, and she asked me if my parents wanted me to break up. Of course my answer was "yes" and thus she siad that I had to break-up because they are my parents and I must obey and honor.

You have to understand that while I was dating this guy he was so manipulative that he had me totally wrapped around his finger, I did anything and everything he said...he had become my "god" as it were. So of course I brought up countless arguments to this lady. I fought her like none other...thinking that I would win, that she like my parents and everyone else who had tried to talk to me and who had tried to get me to break-up, but she was different. You see I am a very stubborn person ( I am guessing that this young lady is not much different that I? And since I was very stuck in his ways then, I had many many arguments, but they fell so easliy to her truths.

All the lies I shared, that I thought would win, fell SO short when faced with the Truth that she shared from God's Word in that I needed and was required to obey my parents.

She said to me after that night that I seemed like a totally different person, like I had been brainwashed...not quite sure if I had been but it sure felt like it. After the break up slowly but surely I began to think differently, and it was almost as if his hold that he had on me fell slowly and slowly away with not being with him and influenced by him.

So I am assuming that this girl is not much different, and that this will not be an easy task. Prayer is a HUGE factor in this! ( when is it ever not??!! :) My parents along with many people from my church had been praying for me. Also the lady who counseled me had just begun to pray about me that very day, because she had not known how bad it had gotten ( she lives 2 hrs away). And that night randomly my sister called her and she asked to talk to me and what started out as a normal conversation turned to a long counseling session.

I would encourage everyone that knows this girl to pray, first off. Also to be open and stay open to opportunities that you have to talk to her. She may, like me, be very closed and resentful to her parents, thus she may need someone from the "outside" as it were, to come in and counsel and talk with her. That is what it took for me! My parents could not get through all we ever did was argue, and it usually ended up with me crying and just growing silent. It took someone from the outside (this lady that I am telling you about) to come in, and mind you she is more stubborn than I, and she stuck to her guns.

Also you can remind her that if this guy is trapping her emotionally, and mentally ( since he is being controlling) than who is to say that one day he won't trap her physically? It is a living nightmare to live with a controlling man! I know of three ladies that lived this way. Two no longer are in this situation but one still is, and they say it is the worst decision they ever made to marry such controlling men! It affects everything esp. your service to God!

Also I am sure that like me, this young lady has "idolized" her boyfriend. To her he has become "god". Now that I have broken up the song "give me Jesus" and also "I'd rather have Jesus" never fails to bring tears to my eyes, just because it reminds me of the time when I had allowed someone else to control me and consume me besides my Savior Jesus Christ!

There is SO much more that I could share, but I this reply is forever long...I hope that this has helped you Kristy. If you have any questions or need more information or need more encouragement, please let me know! My heart goes out to this family! And especially to this young girl! I don't like to hear of others who are going through the heart ache that I went through but it is especially hard to hear of girls who like me are stubborn and too blinded by love to see the red flags that are apparent to everyone else.

I hope that this has been of some help! And I apologize again for the "book"See More


Ps. Also this girl is not married yet, and thus she is still Biblically underneath her parents ( notice I said Biblically, legally she may be of age...I don't know her age... she may legally be of age to just run off and get married.) but B...iblically she is not under anyone elses rule except God and her parents ( government teachers etc). Thus her parents can make this couple break-up. My parents did not do that, but had I not broken it off when I did they would have, and my cousin, who is going through this as well, has been forced by her parents to break-up. And no this is not easy, the daughter may be resentful may even stop speaking with her parents ( as in my cousin's case) but with paitence and prayer the relationship can be restored.

God can change hearts...we humans doubt this sometimes but that is probably due to the fact that we cannot even see hearts, or know them, not even our own "The heart is deceitful above all things,And desperately wicked; Who can know it?" Jer.17:9 , but God not only knows hearts HE FASHIONS them toward Himself "He fashions their hearts individually;He considers all their works."- Psalm 33:15
. Thus I would say that it would be better for the parents to make the girl break-up, put whatever stops need to be in place, and save this girl from ruining her life but more importantly her realtionship to God!See More


Prayer, prayer, and more prayer. After I finally broke off the engagement, everything that everyone ever said to me: verses, prayers, warnings, counsel, etc., came back to me. I allowed myself to be deaf and blind to the love of so many.... Then, when I listened to the Lord, my ears and eyes were opened and I was SO thankful to those who did not give up on me. Thinking back, I know I didn't thank everyone. I pray that they know how much I appreciate them allowing the Lord to work in their hearts and speak through them to me--even though I was so close-minded and argumentative.
Ultimately, we each must make a choice: serve God or ourselves. If we choose to allow other people or things to be gods, then we are choosing to serve ourselves. This path will always lead to destruction. If we choose to "...confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. Rom 10:9 (ESV) If your whole focus is consumed with anyone or anything other than God, you may need to search your heart and question whether or not you truly are a Believer.

Eph. 6:1-4 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
"Honor your father and mother" (this is the first commandment with a promise),
"that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land."
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.


Heidi's reply to kristy 
It is very important for parents to be conscious of not fanning the flames and driving their child away. In my perspective, when my parents stopped arguing and "fighting" me, and "resorted" to praying and letting me know that they still loved and cared about me, I stopped fighting the Holy Spirit's knocking on my heart. I then began to notice red flags and recognize the very real faults that both the guy and myself had.
One of those "red flags" was that the guy actually told me he believed an engagement was as binding as marriage. (He still believed this even after I broke off the engagement and my parents and I agreed to meet with him 1 time to "listen" to him. My heart had completely done a 180 and his words actually fell on new ears that purposely let his words go in one ear and out the other!) I cannot believe I actually considered that for awhile!

Bethany, I would like to pray for you that the Lord will continue to give you His comfort and peace as you heal. Also, I just wanted to remind you that the Lord has a different plan for everyone. Even though it was not His plan for us to get married when we had planned to, nor to the person we thought we wanted to marry, there are others whom the Lord planned to marry young. I have a friend who did marry when she was 19. The Lord has blessed her and her husband and their grown children. This was the Lord's plan for them.
I am so thankful that my dear husband chose to marry me 13 years' ago--even knowing (and watching) what I'd gone through before.
My husband "took me as I am", just as the Lord does with us.
We can come to Him and bare our souls, and He will heal and comfort.
Bethany, if He has "the one" planned for you, He will reveal him to you in His will and timing. Be willing to wait, and He will give you the desires of your heart. : ) "Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart." Ps. 37:4

Good-night everyone.
In humble thanks to the One who made me,
Heidi

My reply to Heidi:

Heidi- Thank you SO much for your prayers! I appreciate that and need them! I am content where I am at right now and am just waiting on the Lord to show me what to do ( whether to stay single or get married). But it is such a wonderful thin...g to be totally surrendered to God, in either marriage or singleness! Thank you for your example and for your encouraging words!

 One of those "red flags" was that the guy actually told me he believed an engagement was as binding as marriage. " - This is SO strange because that is exactly what my boyfriend was telling me! WOW! And I too believed it...and still kind of did until a few weeks ago when I was able to talk with someone about it and she shared with me from scripture that it just is not true! Thank you for your example and for sharing it is encouraging to know that I am not the only one out there that is/was naive! I was in fact afraid to seek help about it because I figured that people would think that i was daranged or something! Good to see that I am not the only one! Thankyou SO much!

Kim- Thank you for asking us to share! It has been a wonderful blessing in my heart to see what others have gone through and how God brought them through it! The glory goes to HIM!!

So use your facebook, any computer time...leisure activities not just for you but for others! Change your focus from self to God and see what He blesses you with! Live a life of ministry making the most of every opportunity!! You will be amazed at what He can do in and through you!

"Dear Bethany, I hold your life in my hands!" Love God....

You might be thinking...okay I knew bethany was strange....but after the title to this note, you might be really confused. Let me explain the title...and perhaps you will still think "how odd" but that is okay!
It seems here lately that the title of this note is what God has been saying to me!

God, in my personal time with Him, and also through a conou trip has been reminding me that my life is in His hands, and that He controls when I die. I do not even know if I will be able to live long enough to finish this note, but God does and not only that but He also controls whether I do or not! WOW! What an odd baffling thought!

He has a reason why I am still breathing, and continue to. I don't have to worry about my death or protecting my life because I will only lose my life when God says and I will only die when it is HIS time for me to. Thus I do not need to fear anything that happens to me! And it just seems that lately God has been reminding me of this fact and also of the fact that life is short! And that I need to be doing what I can when I can, while I can!

We are only a moment....a breath from death every second of everyday! There are so many thing that threaten our very lives, every second of our lives. We are so weak and frail and cannot even control nor could possibly know what is going to happen in between right now, and the time when you will read my next sentence! God has been convicting and working in my heart and life about this these past few days in my devotions....in fact it seems to be my current "reoccuring theme" and as with anything, if God keeps telling me the same thing day in and out I think I had better listen the first time anyway but def. all the times after that! So here is what God has taught me over the course of a week!

And the scary thing is He did not just use His word, to reiderate the fact that I cannot control my own life, He also used a canou trip to get my attention in regards to this lesson that He is currently teaching me. Weird thing is I cannot figure out why He is teaching me this ONE lesson...but funny thing is maybe I don't NEED to know....maybe I just need to trust Him and realize that His plans and thoughts are not mine...and that I don't think like He does...nor always see why He does what He does, and that is okay! I just need to take Him at His Word! God says it and whether I accept it or not THAT SETTLES IT!!
I have been studying Psalm 90 and the following are the lessons that I have been taught:

 "Lord, you have been our dwelling place throughout all generations. - I learned from this verse that even in this world of unknowns God is to be mmy refuge, the Person I trust in... but why should I trust Him? And in the next verse I found the answer


"Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God.- I saw here in verse two that I should and can trust Him because He created this earth and has a plan for it and to put it very simply HE IS GOD...Need I any other explanation? This friends, silenced me.( "Be still and know that I AM GOD!"  kind of idea) I should not need any other explanation! The next verse shows just how much He is in control of my life, whether I acknowledge it or not!


So verse two makes verse one absolutely logical! It would only make sense that I the creature, would trust the Creator that made me and knows me better than I know myself! I love how God's Word connects!

"You turn men back to dust, saying, "Return to dust, O sons of men." - Psalm 90:1-3  God reminded me here that He controls when I die. With this truth I was confronted with the sin of worry! I don't need to worry about death, because I will die when it is His time, not any sooner or later, and it will be what is best for me and for His glory! It is not about me...what I can accomplish in my life, but what GOD accomplishes through me and about HIS GLORY! And I only pray that He will do whatever it takes to show His glory through me, even if it means that I be called home. I will only go home, to my true home when He calls me...when He says 'Return to dust, O sons of men." And He not only controls my death but also everyone elses as well!
Note it said "sons of men" this is everyone!

" For a thousand years in your sight are like a day that has just gone by, or like a watch in the night." Psalm 90:4 Here God showed me/reminded me that He does not think like I do! And I was convicted of how much I think of Him in human terms! In fact anytime I worry I am thinking of God as a mere human....I am telling Him that "He can't handle this problem...or that person" a lack of trust in God demonstrates that I have forgotten that God is God, and that He is ALL POWERFUL and does what He pleases, He is not human, does not think like I do, and thus I should not think of Him that way!

"You sweep men away in the sleep of death;  they are like the new grass of the morning-
 though in the morning it springs up new, by evening it is dry and withered." Psalm 90:5-6
Here I was reminded that my life is short! It feels like just yesterday I was a freshmaun at college...telling myself that college would take FOREVER! And already I am in my third year ( hard to believe..what a surprise I survived! hee hee) TIME FLYS! It seems to go slow, but then you blink and already the years have flown...the children have grown, and you are five years older!

I remember times when I would get stuck in the trench of thinking, (though not aloud) that I am immortal.  Sometimes I get caught up in living  everyday like my life will never end. Then God does something, or says something to me through His Word and reminds me of how frail I am.  The first lesson I ever had in this happened when I was only eight.  My mom said that we needed to go see dad at his office, so we,  Krista and I and my  brother Joseph hopped into the car and drove to  my dads office at Fellowship Baptist Church  where he was the associate pastor.

 I remember shuffling in there, excited to hear what possible news mom would have for us that would cause us to just get up and go to church.  When we got there she informed us that she was pregnant. We were all very excited! I even remember jumping up and down with Joseph and Krista. This jubilation turned very quickly to mourning when my little brother Joshua was called home to be with Jesus before he could even meet any of us.

I still think about him, what he would have looked like...what it would have beem like to have four brothers...but the lesson I learned ( and the reason I am telling you about Josh is this: I learned at eight the frailty of life. Josh's death came as a shock to everyone. He had gotten the cord wrapped around his kneck and had suffocated...my mom delivered him stillborn. I learned that NO ONE ( not even a baby who has not even taken a breath yet) is garunteed tommorow)  But obviously it did not stick!

For a few years later, when I was 14 or 15, a young boy that my mother used to babysit was killed at the young age of ten in a car accident. Eric was hit by a speeding car when he was crossing the street to go to church for Awana on a cold novemeber evening. His death too came as a shock. It was devastating for me and I did not know him well...I think the reason for this is that he was just a boy...just a kid and he died...just like that!

Yet again a few years later after I repented of my sin of an eating disorder and got back on track with God, He showed me just how close I came to death during my sin. (If you want to know the details on this story you can look up my note on here entitled "My secret: or so i thought?" it has the whole story of my sin and confession and turn around and also explains just how close to death I was ) no I was not hospitalized or anything..but I will say that I was playin with death itself...and if God had not gotten a hold of me, death would have won! So perhaps you are thinking okay you learned your lesson after that....NOPE!

Yet again a few years later I had to be reminded yet again of the frailty of life this time through my sixteen year old cousin's heart attack. She was healthy and strong, playing in a soccer game one minute, the next minute she was lying on the soccer feild...her heart had stopped.  No one had any control or power....we were all powerless to help her, but it was not her time to go for God had other plans! He was in control and had a reason for that...one of which I think was to remind me that life is short and we are not garunteed tommorrow!

So you would think that all these would be enough...that I would have this lesson on the frailty of life and God's control over my life down flat! WRONG!! He still is reminding me of this! But esp. as I have been stating over the past week through Psalm 90...which reminds me...after going through some stories of my life...I think it is time to come back to psalm 90...

And perhaps now I should explain myself a bit. When I do my devotions I usually only end up reading one or two verses at a time, because I am trying to write down and record every single thing about God in each verse of the psalms that I read ( it has become quite a list! The psalms has ALOT to say about Him!) So as I read  this psalm I learned one day about the frailty of life, then the next I learned something else, but then the next day after that the Psalmist goes back to that thought ( the frailty of man) thus it has become a reoccuring theme with me! And again I state that God must have a reason for this!

Psalm 90:10   "The length of our days is seventy years—  or eighty, if we have the strength; yet their span  is but trouble and sorrow,        for they quickly pass, and we fly away."- Again after only a few days God reminded me that life is short. Thus in the application part of my notebook I wrote : I need to be redeeming the time..literllly buying it back...for it is SO short!

And can so easlily be wasted...like water spilt on the ground...it cannot be gathered back up...thus all I do is use the rest that is there the best I can! I need to be using the time God gives me wisely...for I am not garunteed tommorrow..and even if I were life is So short and it will end and then what will I have to show for God gave me? How will I have used God's gift of life? I was reminded of the song "Only one life to offer."

Only what is done for Him will last!
And here in my most recent devo God showed me the only right reaction to these truths of the frailty of my life and His control over it and death:
Psalm 90:12
 "Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." He showed me that the application that I had been writing all along ("Redeeming the time") was the right application! I need to ask that He teach me to number my days...you see that is why I have to keep being reminded ( and always will) that my life is short. I need too be reminded because I forget! It is not something that comes naturally for me..I do not naturally think to myself every morning "this could be my last day....I could die today...i need to use my time wisely" nope I need to ask God to help me to think this way and not only to think this way but to live this way and to allow this truth to affect ALL I say and do!

Imagine how better my relationships with people would be if I lived these truths out...I mean after all it could be my last time with them...these could be my last words...last discipling moment...will I use it to encourage...or put down...will I take it or just let it go?
Imagine how different my ministries would be! This could be my last time singing in church...playing....teaching...calling on people.
Imagine how it would affect my evangelism!

No wonder God calls this WISE thinking! For it would help EVERY situation if I would just number my days and redeem the time!!
And it not only states numbering your days ( or living in light of the fact that life is short) is wise here but it also states it again in Eph. 5:16-17 (redeeming the time passage)
"See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise,
 Redeeming the time, because the days are evil.
 Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is." Did you catch it too? It is wise to redeem the time, to use and see our time for what it really is a stewardship and as with any stewardship, we are only given so much of it and for such a time...but the time will come when it will be taken back by its rightful owner ( in our case God) and will He be pleased with how I have used HIS time? It is not mine. Funny how when we borrow a book, or a movie, or anything from someone we always take better care of it than we do of our own book or movie, or you fill in the blank...should it not be the SAME with GOD?

Okay now that I have taken you through how God taught me this lesson through His marvelous word, let me share how He taught me this through an event in my life...and I really hate to do this..but if you want to know about this you are going to have to read the second note I will post on here about it to get "the rest of the story" until then may you just reflect on the truths from God's Word!...plus this note has gotten longer than expected...so I think it will be safer to just write a second note..so be looking for it :)

"See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise,
 Redeeming the time, because the days are evil.
 Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is." Eph. 5:16-17

REDEEM THE TIME FOR WE ARE NOT PROMISED TOMMORROW:
"You sweep men away in the sleep of death;they are like the new grass of the morning-
though in the morning it springs up new, by evening it is dry and withered." Psalm 90: 5-6