Pride sparkling in his eyes, my father brought the little
bundle down to our level so we could see. “This is Joseph.” Krista and I were
but four and two. Our little bodies swelled with excitement. Little did we know
that we would have the privilege of repeating this very seen three more times! I
have had many different reactions from others upon hearing that I grew up in a
family of six kids.
Things like: “Never a dull moment” (They are right there…from
making a sand box out of our couch, to climbing on our roof while dad was in a
deacons meeting, to breaking windows, to making fun movies, to stunts like no
one would believe!). Things like: “Aw I bet that was fun! Someone always has
your back.”
What dreams my parent’s
must have had for us! They longed to see us get along. I can’t imagine what it
was like for them when the first fight broke out amongst us. It was most likely
between Krista and I (there would be many to follow…to my shame). Probably over
a toy, or over the attention of our parents. How it must of hurt my parents to
see us fight so. “They are sisters!”
I can still remember one of my dad’s favorite sayings “You
are ___ (insert sibling name: Krista’s…Joe’s…Andy’s..Caleb’s…Breanna’s) best
friend! You should not treat them like that!” It is a saying that I
appreciated, and that he said so often that we all began to refer to each other
as such: Friends (Still do!)
I would even tell my own friends that my best friends were
my siblings, many of my friends said they had wished they could have that kind
of relationship with their siblings. I always wondered why they did’nt…sure us
Duffy kids fought (still do) but at the end of the day we always asked for
forgiveness and did our best to mend the ways and call eachother friend once
again.
Sibling rivalry… it happens…it is to be expected…or is it?
I could hardly contain myself. Focus Bethany
Moments later, I got the text I had been waiting for,
telling me he was here and that I should come out and see her. I practically
ran out of that library at faith! Once outside, under the light of the moon, I
could see Joshy’s face beeming with pride, and with the joy of seeing my own
face light up. He set the tote down and I rushed to it. Down inside was the
cutest furball I had ever seen.
“Do you like her?”
“Oh Joshy, I love her!” I would have given him a hug, had we
not been “on campus.” Lol. “Good, she is your valentines day gift.”
Joshy and I were elated!! God had already blessed us with a
Siberian Husky (Joshy’s dog chief), and now here we were, blessed once again. This
time with a little mini Aussie mix pup that was free! He brought her home and I
fell in love with little Fiona (we wanted an Irish nameJ ).
She is all spunk, and has quite the little character about
her. Timid around strangers, is her only downside J. She melts my heart!
The lady we got her from, had an “accidental litter.” Her
mini aussie male got to her female border collie. So she gave all the pups away
for free. By the time we had heard about it, she had a home for all accept
Fiona (which was ironically the one I liked the best from the pics.).
Since we have been blessed with a farm, Joshy and I knew
that we would want some good hardy “farm dogs.” So we told the lady that if
anyone backed out on any of the others we would take just one more…little did
we know what we were getting into!
A couple of weeks went by, we were really beginning to enjoy
Fiona. I took her out to run at the farm any chance I could. It’s always fun to
go to the back pasture and run down that big hill (reminds me of little house
on the prairie lol) and watch Fiona speed past me!
She is also HUGE on fetch and so that was a joy as well! Oh
and she loves chasing soccer balls, and I love kicking them!! Anyways, it was
fun!
Then the day came when we were contacted by the lady we got
Fifi from. She told Joshy that someone had backed out on taking Fiona’s sister,
and asked if we wanted her. Joshy of course came to ask me what I thought. Now,
I have always loved animals, but especially dogs in particular, what an amazing
blessing to have a man who loves them just as much as I do.
Sometimes I wonder why from the beginning I have always had
a fascination with dogs, and living in the country and farm life and hunting
and fishing…God knows best!! He has had a plan all along…so thankful He is
writing my story and not me!
Anyways, I said “yes” of course. I could see the joy light
up in Joshy’s eyes. We will own two pups…sisters at that! “It’ll be like having
twins!!” Joshy just rolled his eyes.
“Okay maybe not quite…this will be fun thought sweets! Two
farm pups!”
If only we had known! He went to get her and brought her
back. I loved her too. But as I got to know her, I loved Fiona a bit more, and
Joshy began to love Alice
I was expecting Alice
Where Fiona is
lighter colored and looks more like an Aussie, Alice
Fiona has a bit more course of a coat (not real course) but Alice Alice Alice
But all that was okay. It would have been nice to have two
different types of dog at the farm. It would have been nice to have Fiona the “go
go go” and Alice the brave, and all their stark differences. I came to love
them for who they were, enjoying their strengths and differences.
But they did’nt get along at all! We learned this early on.
When we first introduced them their immediate reaction was to growl at one
another. Not at all what Joshy and I had expected and even looked forward to.
We figured that since they were sisters, and since they had not seen each other
in forever, they would whimper and kiss one another and have some puppy play.
It was kind of a huge let down to see their hair bristle, and watch them be so
wary of one another. It was like they were judging one another and protecting
themselves.
As time went on, we discovered that we could not feed them
together. They began to fight over food. And not long after that they began to
fight over us, and the attention we gave to each. Joshy and I were at such a
loss as to what to do. We loved them both, we had plenty of food for both,
plenty of love for both.
But they just would not stop fighting. It was awful! They
fought so hard they would make each other bleed. Their fights would last for
quite some time (until they ran out of steam to keep going).
It was sad and devastating…we just wished they would get
along…we longed for them to just “get over it” and back down. They only had
their puppy teeth, but were already doing damage. They were sisters…were they
not suppose to love one another? Truth is they were fighting for dominance. For
significance, they wanted to be more significant than the other.
Upon watching fight after fight, I began to be afraid to
even spend time with them anymore, for fear that another fight would break out.
I no longer looked forward to time at the farm because of them. It was just a
mess! I was beginning to dread having them both! Something had to change. So we
gave Alice
Someone on the outside looking in on this little story might
think there is nothing to be learned. Or perhaps you have picked up on the
obvious lesson of being wise in ones decisions. But what about the less obvious
lessons? There are somethings to be learned here of not only our relationship
with others, but with God as well!
Alice and Fiona were aiming as I stated before, for
significance, for prominence above the other. They wanted Josh and I to choose
one over the other. Alice
It was painful to watch, it was sad and it made me fearful
to watch them fight. This friends is a picture of what it must be like for God
Almighty to look upon the fights Christians with other Christians!!
If you are a believer, if you have accepted Christ as your
Savior, you are now a child of God: “John 1:12
But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of
God, even to those who believe in His name.”
Romans 8:16 “The
Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are children of God,”
The World does not understand this bond with have with God:
1 John 1:3 “See how great a love the Father has bestowed on
us, that we would be called children of God; and such we are. For this
reason the world does not know us, because it did not know Him.
If we are then children in relation to God, then we are then
and therefore siblings of all saved people!! Is’nt odd how we just assumed tht
Fiona and Alice would get along simply because they are sisters? Everyone who I
have talked to about their fighting, agrees with me, they should get along,
they are sisters!
God must think the
same!
How it utterly must devastate Him when He sees us, His dear
children, what He must think… perhaps He thinks “What ____ is fighting ____??!
They are sisters (or brothers, or siblings depending upon the situation)…this
should not be!” We think it odd when sibling animals fight; we think the same
even when we see physical, blood related humans fighting! How much the more
should we when SPIRITUAL SIBLINGS FIGHT!
Christians fight, we
have all seen it (and have most likely had our share in the spiritual sibling
rivalry). We Christians fight other Christians for many different reasons. Over
where we sit at church, over what music should or should not be played in
church. We fight over the color of the carpet for pete’s sake!
We all know and have known these things. But what it can
boil down to, is often exactly what Fiona and Alice
These desires drive us, they sit on the thrones of our
hearts, and we all know that what is in our hearts comes out! God through the
writer James, the brother of our Savior Jesus Christ, tells us exactly why we
fight with others:
“What is the source of quarrels and conflicts
among you? Is not the source your pleasures that wage war in your members? 2 You lust and do not have;
so you commit murder. You are envious and cannot obtain; so you
fight and quarrel. You do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because
you ask [c]with wrong motives, so that you may spend it
on your pleasures.” James 4:1-3. We fight because we have wrong desires.
We either desire the right thing at the wrong time, or in the wrong way.
From watching my own dear puppies
fight, I can begin to see a small picture of what it must be like for God the
Father to watch His dear children (Christians) fight their siblings! Fiona
still has scabs all over her neck from the battles (Alice
We too, have battles, and we too often get hurt as well
(emotionally, for some maybe even dare I say physically). If you take a look at
the armour of God Eph. 6, you will quickly notice that all of the weaponry is
frontal. What I mean is it is all to protect the front of you. Why you may ask…that’s
because Roman soldiers (Paul’s inspiration for the armour of God) needed not be
protected on their backs, because their comrades, those fighting by their
sides, were to protect one another. Thus the statement “I got your back!”
You see we don’t have protection for our backs, they are
exposed, perhaps this is why it stings SO badly, and also why it is so odd,
when siblings turn and weild the sword against us (for some reason the battle
of music comes to mind…probably because often Scripture is pitted against
scripture in this battle!). What God must think when He sees this! Oh the
wounds that should have never been there!
Sad thing is, our job as soldiers is to stand, not to
advance (significance thing we always aim for and fight over). We are not to
aim to gain ground but rather to keep the ground we have! But how hard that is
when we begin to fight our comrades! We lose ground folks! And Satan gains it!!
So perhaps you are currently involved in a battle with
another Christian. WE must remember we ARE SIBLINGS! We are all Children of
God! We don’t need to fight for significance, God uses everyone and has gifted
us all:
“Therefore I, the prisoner of the
Lord, implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have
been called, 2 with
all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in
love, 3 being
diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
4 There is one
body and one Spirit, just as also you were called in one hope of your calling;
5 one Lord, one
faith, one baptism, 6 one God and Father of all who is over all and
through all and in all.
7 But to each one of us grace was given )according to the measure of Christ’s gift. 8 Therefore it says,
“(When He ascended on high,
He (led captive a host of captives,
And He gave gifts to men.” Eph. 4:1-8
He (led captive a host of captives,
And He gave gifts to men.” Eph. 4:1-8
We are ONE! Did you catch that?? We all
serve the same God! ONE GOD! We are to keep the unity! Did you catch that? We
were all once the same: captive! Did you catch that? And what has God done? He
has given us gifts! Just like Fiona and Alice were not the same, just like they
had their own set of unique strengths and weaknesses, so too all Christians
have their own unique strengths and weaknesses. But the same is true for all:
we have all been given gifts! So use them! Don’t be envious of other’s gifts,
be thankful to God for them!
Christ said we are to
be known by our love for each other (other Christians). One of the greatest
hinderances to the furthering of His Kingdom is the battles we fight with one
another…it damages our testimony to the unsaved:
“By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you
have love for one another.” John 13:35
So perhaps today you need to mend a relationship with a
sibling (spiritual) of yours? Does love need to cover it??:
“Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another,
because love covers a multitude of sins.” 1 Peter 4:8
Do you need to forgive? Be forgiven? Whatever it is, above
all you are to love:
“By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you
have love for one another.” John 13:35
I pray you were challenged as I have been!
No comments:
Post a Comment